The Reddit bitcoin tipping bot is the worst way to promote bitcoin and the shills won’t shut up about it.
I have a confession to make: I read Reddit. I feel so dirty for reading that shithole of mysogony, racism and creepy borderline pedophelic behavior but I do love pictures of cats getting their heads stuck in jars. What’s a man to do?
One of the few subreddit I actually subscribe to is naturally /r/bitcoin. The subreddit that was originally owned by infamous bitcoiner Atlas (who tried to sell off the subreddit at one point) has grown quite a bit since it’s inception. In fact, not to toot our own horn or anything, but with only 200+ upvotes, our article on Bruce Wagner was the top post of all time in the Bitcoin subreddit for several months before some shitty image macro complaining about Paypal replaced it. Out of this subreddit a grand idea was born, the Bitcoin Tipping Bot.
The way the bot works is amazingly simple. Just follow these few steps:
- First know what bitcoin is and get yourself some. I’m not going to explain this part because most people will not get this far.
- Message the bot /u/bitcointip “SIGNUP”. A bitcoin address will be created for you.
- Send your bitcoins to this second wallet that you don’t control
- Tip other redditors by commenting on posts using the format “+/u/bitcointip @username (amount)
That’s all there really is to send bitcoins. Actually receiving bitcoins is fucking terrible for a person who has no interest in bitcoins in the first place. I discovered this first hand when someone tipped me $1 and I tried to claim it.
I posted an article a little while ago titled “Cards against Humanity kindly tells Bitcoiners to please go fuck themselves” which was about the creator of the wildly popular Cards against Humanity game turning down the offer to accept bitcoins and the person who asked ends up being a little bitch about it. Go read the article, I’ll wait.
Eventually someone on Reddit with half a brain posted a thoughtful message to the Reddit community that trying to be snide dicks and forcing businesses to accept your busted funny money maybe isn’t the best way to grow your economy.
The link was posted without context so the OP posted a link to our Buttcoin article. Since I like to namesearch myself on social media in between chronic masturbatory sessions, I decided to jump in and defend myself against people who can’t seem to grasp things like “hobbies” and other non-profitable ventures. The following exchange took place:
Someone, out of the kindness of their heart, took the time to send me a whole dollar just to .. spite me? Shame me? For whatever reason, Reddit loves to throw micro-bucks around Reddit, and they actually consider it to be one of the best validations that Bitcoin is a real currency.
We wrote up an article earlier on the site about how Reddit just loves to wander into different subreddits and “expose people to the value of Bitcoins”. They do this via the Bitcoin tip bot and you can always identify when it’s being used as a quasi-advertisement for Bitcoin via the phrase “Whoa, what just happened here?“. It’s like they’re reading from a script. Once you see it once you can’t stop seeing it and the constant shilling becomes unbearable. There will frequently be calls to go rush a post’s comment section to do nothing but tip and hype and shill for bitcoins. And the commenters are in it too because if you can get there first or pump Bitcoins hard enough you too could get a micro Bitcoin sent your way!
I’ve never known what it’s like to actually receive a tip however, and since I now have my shiny new nickel I thought I’d find out what kind of hoops I’d have to jump through to claim this money.
The first thing that happens if you get a message in your PM box on reddit. It tells you who sent you your funbux, how much, and if you want to accept or decline it.
I really like getting money for free so of course I mashed that ACCEPT button with my grubby mitts!
So then it gives me this. I guess the way it works if that you just message back the bot? I really have no idea but I’m a very busy man so I just blindly click the accept button…
And then nothing. After I hit accept that’s pretty much it. There’s no next steps, there’s no “go here to spend it”, there’s not even anything telling me what the fuck bitcoins are. To just hit ACCEPT and then your bitcoins get shuttled off into some randomly created bitcoin wallet which you don’t own yet. I wait about 20 minutes to see if there’s any more PMs coming but nothing. I go back to my PMs and click on the little [ABOUT] link in the first one to see if I can figure out what this is all about.
Clicking that link takes you to this page.
Do you see the problem here? This is the documentation for how to operate the bot. This page doesn’t direct you on how to get your money, what a wallet is or does or even what a bitcoin is. It does tell how to fund your tipping account, how to tip other users and other unrelated shit to someone who recieved got 18 cents in internet money.
If you scroll down enough you see there’s a series of commands that you can PM to the bot. It doesn’t specify if these are for send or receiving Bitcoins but what the hell let’s give it a shot. I got some Sour Patch Kids with my name on it at the local CVS and I need to get my $1.
I click the link that says WITHDRAW and it sends me to another PM prompt to withdraw my coins from the random wallet they’re trapped in.
WTF is a BitcoinAddress? I go back to the documentation and there’s nothing there about what a bitcoin address is or what I’m supposed to do. I abandon this step for a second and want to make sure my bitcoins didn’t disappear into the ether or that is all just some sort of scam.
I hit the BALANCE link on the page and get another oh-so helpful PM prompt.
Alright, I send off for my balance and wait some more. Over an hour passes and I don’t see a response from the bot anywhere in my PMs.
Nothing at all, no response. Wouldn’t some website be easier? An account I could create? can’t I just get on this fucking website and get my money already, I got some motherfucking Shaq Soda to buy!
Finally I get a response.
By this time I’ve jacked off like 28 times and I’m ready for bed and don’t really have time for this shit so I decide to jettison my Bitcoins off into the ether instead. I decide I want to send my Bitcoins to the EFF but they wisely declined.
So no can do.
The whole r/bitcointip subreddit still doesn’t tell me shit so I just google “default bitcoin address” and get this lovely address in return.
1BitcoinEaterAddressDontSendf59kuE
That seems like a good address. I decide to send my bitcoins there to that nice guy or gal can do something great in the world with that money.
Back to the documentation I hit up the WITHDRAW link again.
God speed little Bitcoin!
NO TRANSACTION FEES! So I didn’t really get a dollar because the Bitcoin bot needs a little cheddar to grease his palms. EDIT:It’s actually because bitcoin does have transaction fees. WELP.
I bust out the TI-86, do a little math and figure out I can only send off .0098 Bitcoins instead. Round 2:
Success!
The transaction ends up confirming 4 fucking hours later
Currency of the future!
So why do these idiots still throw this crap around in the comments every chance they get. There’s 2 main reasons why it’s hyped on Reddit constantly.
- True Believers think that the one and only thing preventing adoption of Bitcoin is that its lack of awareness. They simply cannot fathom a scenario where you present an argument in favor of using Bitcoin over something like cash and not have someone jump at the chance. This is a way to “get the word out” with the least amount of effort possible and if you jump on the hype bandwagon you can possibly make some money in the process!
- It’s relatively low risk. You see, if your tipee doesn’t claim their Bitcoin in 21 days it goes back into your tipping pool. Wouldn’t it be nice that if you tipped that waitress at Denny’s, she doesn’t spend that
$20$10$5$2.80 and instead of her being able to save it for a rainy day, it just found it’s way back to your wallet? That’s how bitcoin works! No chargebacks but we can still have takebacks!
The bitcoin tip bot is really nothing more than an easy way for smug pricks to throw worthless “money” around while they jerk off over each other trying to out-surprise one another for internet nickles.
mmmmtaint
September 6, 2013 @ 7:54 pm
I think you needed to create a bitcoin wallet and use that address to claim your money, then funnel it through some trading card website so that you can get it sent to your paypal account and you can wind up with roughly 80 cents of your $1.04 tip, all at the cost of roughly 40 minutes of your time. It’s so easy and intuitive that I can’t believe you didn’t see that immediately.
Ivan Sorensen
September 17, 2013 @ 10:40 am
There’s basically zero way this could not catch on everywhere!
DQ
September 6, 2013 @ 10:21 pm
Well said.
+cosbytip “Have you ever tried to blow out a flare? You get burns on your upper lip.” verify
Drake Brasky
September 8, 2013 @ 7:08 pm
When is bitcoin set to collapse? Havent you predicted it about 10 times already? You need some new material.
zeekthegeek
September 9, 2013 @ 10:02 pm
Good reading comprehension, they don’t mention collapse even once in this article. You’re bringing your own baggage.
HamsterCoin
September 9, 2013 @ 6:23 am
Why is this hamster reddit reading guy still writing about reddit?
Razz
September 9, 2013 @ 8:23 am
This article wasn’t written by KillHamster.
It’s okay. Reading comprehension is hard.
HamsterButt
September 11, 2013 @ 4:19 am
Oh, You think I read that stuff… That’s cute 🙂
killhamster
September 9, 2013 @ 8:30 am
I’m happy that I’ve gotten under your skin so effectively that you’re now seeing me everywhere.
Imlost
September 10, 2013 @ 3:32 am
Thank you. When I got tipped a bitcoin I had no idea what to do with it. There is virtually nothing that tells you what to do and the the links the bot provides just directions to the announcement of them making the bot. Having no idea what I was doing I managed to create a wallet and was able to withdraw to it. So now I have a hash that I have no idea how to even use that was worth a dollar, minus fees of course. When I got my second tip weeks later I managed to stumble into the fact they you can ask the bot for your account info. It turns out that the bot creates an account and then adds the bitcoin to it. The bot then sends the username and password for your account. The service they use for these accounts have fees which is why the withdrawal wouldn’t work, not because the bot itself was taking any money off the top. I still have no idea what I am suppose to do with these bitcoins so they just sit there.
paulsnx2
September 10, 2013 @ 1:06 pm
You went to the EFF foundation, and couldn’t figure out how to donate to them. Because there is no obvious “pay with Bitcoin” thing on the top of the page? Solution. Scroll to the bottom:
http://i.imgur.com/JZo1o9o.png
Fluxity
September 10, 2013 @ 1:30 pm
Oh cool, just let me know how to send them the useless 98 cents I got. Thanks.
paulsnx2
September 10, 2013 @ 1:49 pm
Say you are sending 5 dollars, get the BTC address, and send them 98 cents. The 5 dollar limit is because credit cards rape them so much with processing fees that they have to make it worth their while.
With Bitpay it is a flat 1 percent for merchants, and free for non-profits. They will get the whole 98 cents you send.
Kris Olhovsky
September 11, 2013 @ 3:21 am
Your article says that you sent your coins to the 1BitcoinEater[…] address. You said “The transaction ends up confirming 4 fucking hours later”.
You weren’t lying I hope.
paulsnx2
September 10, 2013 @ 1:23 pm
Also, a note about all the trashing you document. I am a Bitcoiner, and have been off and on since 2011. I have been very active most of this year in the Bitcoin world.
Even I didn’t know what to do with the tips. I would just verify them, and go on my way. This has gone on for most of the year.
The other day I saw my balance was up to 12 dollars. (it is ~18.37 now, mostly due to the recent rise in Bitcoin prices). So I decided to figure out how to withdraw.
I obviously had a Bitcoin Address, so providing one was not a problem. I withdrew roughly $1 worth of Bitcoin.
Success. So I now have ?0.14531527 in my reddit account, and I can use it to tip other people. Why bother to withdraw it?
tl;dr: The author makes a mountain out of a mole hill. Just verify, and go your way.
killhamster
September 10, 2013 @ 1:26 pm
lol that you care so much
paulsnx2
September 10, 2013 @ 1:58 pm
I really care. It is all about the hamsters…
Fluxity
September 10, 2013 @ 1:31 pm
So you’re saying someone sent me some money but I shouldn’t actually try and withdraw that money or spend it, but should just let it collect in an account and then maybe give it to other people who also shouldn’t withdraw or spend it?
This is amazing!
killhamster
September 10, 2013 @ 1:33 pm
This is obviously the currency of the future and we were fools to have mocked it!
paulsnx2
September 10, 2013 @ 1:47 pm
Not at all. Bitcoin is the currency of the future, but the wallets and infrastructure for using it need to improve.
Maybe for now it benefits those most who are willing to spend the time and energy to figure it out. And as time goes by, it should get easier for everyone else too.
paulsnx2
September 10, 2013 @ 1:45 pm
Nothing about being tipped with BTC requires you to waste your time if you don’t want to.
But put it another way. Say you let it ride a year. What would happen (if next year is like this year)? Well, it would go up in value like 10x.
Why bother with 1 dollar today, if it will be 10 tomorrow? Or in my case 180 dollars? I see no compelling reason to thrash about with BTC if you don’t use BTC. If you are a user, then doing the withdraw is easy.
Fluxity
September 10, 2013 @ 1:51 pm
The what the hell is the purpose of the bot to “spread awareness” if you’re just supposed to sit on them and not actually use them or participate in the quote “bitcoin economy”?
This bot it nothing more that a method for people to flood comment sections in other subreddits and try to get people to join bitcoin like a bunch of cult members. There’s a reason the bot was banned in /r/technology.
paulsnx2
September 10, 2013 @ 2:00 pm
Some people get a wallet, make some small purchase, and yeah, they can then see how it works.
Others (it seems like yourself) get all in a wad about it. But in my experience, “Wad’ers” will get in a wad about something no matter what people do. So why worry about them?
John Andersson
September 10, 2013 @ 4:00 pm
Infinite growth, duh. (Bitcoin will become the world’s only currency)
Kris Olhovsky
September 15, 2013 @ 10:35 pm
There’s also a reason that the bot was unbanned in /r/technology.
William W.
November 14, 2013 @ 9:26 am
When a friend gives you $20 for christmas, are you physically uncomfortable if you don’t sprint over to a convenience store and spend it immediately? Would putting your coat and boots on and walking through the snow to spend it be inconvenient? Yes.
seahen
March 9, 2014 @ 5:05 am
It’s like when the US was theoretically on the gold standard, but redemption was suspended. When you had a dollar, you had a small amount of gold, but you couldn’t actually withdraw that gold or make it into a ring…
Fluxity
September 10, 2013 @ 1:38 pm
Wait, lemme put this into a meme you can understand.
paulsnx2
September 10, 2013 @ 1:42 pm
uhhhh, not sure that was the point I was making. I just didn’t worry about the tips until there was enough to think about. (for me that hit at about 12 dollars). Then I proved to myself I could access them.
Then because I actually have a job and don’t need the tips, I let them ride. Now they are worth 18 bucks (even with the dollar I took out).
I am happy to let them ride, and maybe tip other people.
I have all the options without all the heartache of the author.
Jester
October 15, 2013 @ 5:49 pm
To me, it just seems like something fun to do. It’s not like it’s costing you real money, just the amount of time it takes to type a comment, maybe send a few messages from time to time.
If you get a decent amount of real money eventually, awesome, but if not, you just had fun wasting your time, which is what you were on Reddit to do in the first place.
Kris Olhovsky
September 11, 2013 @ 3:27 am
The message you received from the BitcoinTip bot is old. The bitcointip bot currently gives you simple instructions for how to send your tip to another user, or withdraw to any address in the PM response to your ACCEPT request:
http://i.imgur.com/vEd74NX.png
So that seems to invalidate 90%+ of your article. Sorry!
heidiho
September 15, 2013 @ 4:53 pm
It’s a start, but still not clear on how to send this tip to the bitcoin bucket :<
Redditor
December 23, 2013 @ 4:36 pm
Thank you for that, came here to post this
Wooxer Pt
March 17, 2014 @ 7:01 pm
“It
Fluxity
March 17, 2014 @ 8:02 pm
Which is what the article is about so I’m not sure what you’re trying to say.
Wooxer Pt
March 21, 2014 @ 8:08 am
Then read again, and if after that you’re stll not sure then read again, ad infinitum, until you do.